Tag Archives: education

Anger and Rage filled People are Always Right, in Their View!

Posted on by

With the Presidential Elections happening later this year in the United States, the silly political theater is in full effect. Intelligence, cooperation, negotiation, reasoning, and civility go “out the window.” The people who yell loudest, even though a minority in the electorate, seem to get the most crazy, media time due to the fact the media loves the “crazies.” (Good screen-time…) So, I offer a few thoughts on how to view the process…

There are a lot of angry and rage driven people in this country (and the world) and they are always right, at least in their belief system. Most of these people have developed their habitual “knee-jerk” reaction to any opposing thought, by allowing their anger and rage to rise to the surface, and without any appropriate filtering, find expression. Historically, polite society has encouraged a safety net of emotional filtration of the expression of anger. We have developed laws that are supposed to keep strong emotions from taking over and the expression of emotional rage from being demonstrated. We have even developed laws which say that angry people in relationships can not, legally, beat each other or their children (as in domestic violence or child abuse.) Our system allows for “free expression” of our political views but has discouraged “punching someone out” for disagreeing. We do have problems with anger filled bullies who attempt to control situations with their anger by shouting down any opposing conversation or action. On their terms, free expression is sanctioned but only toward someone who holds their same belief. In this way, a minority can control the political process by saying “NO” and bullying any opposition.

Very often these angry, rage filled people are driven by their value system that sees things in “black and white” terms. “Either you are for me or against me” mentality. There is no “gray zone” where there is room to work together with compromise. This is why the congressional process in the United States has ground to a halt and become ineffective. No room to compromise means a minority opinion can control the political process. The person who “yells louder” wins the discussion and angry people, who have no appreciation for the act of compromise, seem to control progress by grinding negotiation to a halt.

“Black and white” values and expressing anger/rage are linked together. This value system historically has given rise to dictatorships and totalitarian regimes like the one currently controlling Iran and, in the past, Nazi Germany. The minorities take control of their political process, and their governments, without regard for compromise and the basic human rights of opposing beliefs. There are dangerous people who might strap an explosive vest to their body and walk into a crowded market to detonate their bomb. Terrorists are very “black and white” in their thinking. They often have a belief that if you do not agree with their values you deserve to die, even if other innocent people die also. Religious extremists and political extremists are not dissimilar in their “black and white,” “right or wrong” attitudes and values. They can be quick to anger with opposition and when they “act out,” headlines are made. For rational people who understand the value of compromise, this is very scary. As our world continues toward political and religious polarization, violence and angry outbursts will escalate.

There is an appropriate place for anger. There are appropriate ways to express dissatisfaction, even rage, but extremism, from any political or religious mindset, needs to be expressed through the filters of rational and appropriate communication. The world is getting too crowded and too small for minority bullies to be running the show.

Mutual respect, tolerance of differing views, and the acceptance that other people’s beliefs can be shared, but not forced on non-believers, seems necessary in our shrinking and over-crowded world.

Be wary of preachers and politicians who are too extreme in their “black and white” sermons, with little or no regard for another opinion. These bullies can control followers and drive them to act unfairly in the mob that they create. Their most ardent supporters are often people who are under-educated or who are impulsive because they are not able to think clearly about available options that can create positive solutions to pressing issues. Stand up and use your brain so that you are not “controlled” and duped into behaviors that rational people of the world would find to be stupid or inappropriate. It is our responsibility to seek all the information on both sides of an issue before we make our final decision, as the framers of the constitution of the United States intended. (Do not rely on any one source of information and news coverage. It may require an effort that even looks outside our country’s media sources.) This requires time and effort, not the “follow the tail in front of you” approach as circus elephants are trained to do. If you can not find your way, safely, out of the narrow minded thinking, then at least do not react in a “knee-jerk” fit of rage to an opposing point of view. Perhaps, as a reasonable alternative, engage in tolerance. “Civics” as a study, and part of our education process, has largely been lost to educational budget cuts in the United States, and with it, the education regarding how the political process is supposed to work and how the voters are supposed to prepare themselves to make good voting decisions. To often we are lead to the polls by the demagogues who yell the loudest and control our media’s attention.

Please be responsible and do not be lazy when you choose your government, or, you are doomed to pay the price…

3 Pillars of Health and Wellness

Posted on by

Most people want to be healthy. Most people enjoy feeling good, having energy, and having their bodies be able to do the activities that are required. Most people take their good health for granted until an accident or illness robs them of their naivety. As we get older, most of us discover that good health is not always to be expected and that it may require some attention to maintain even normal levels of good health. We inherit characteristics from our families both physically, through our genetic code, and as we learn about lifestyle choices. Many families have heart disease or diabetes or obesity or dental problems, etc in their family histories which means that you may be born with a proclivity to develop certain health challenges. Or, we learn by watching our parents live in a healthy way (lifestyle) or a less than healthy lifestyle. We can not always prevent the characteristics we inherit from having a negative impact on our health and our lives. We can take steps to minimize the possible problems from developing or keep them from affecting us in the most damaging ways by practicing health and wellness for prevention. This is easier said than done.

Most people lack the focus, the motivation, and the energy to select the healthier options and to use them regularly. That is why the lifestyle diseases like heart disease, strokes, lung cancer, addiction, and obesity are still the major killers in our society. That is one huge reason why our healthcare costs are so high.
If we “took responsibility” for our good health and practiced wellness, we could live longer in better health. Taking responsibility for our actions is not practiced or taught effectively in our society (editorial opinion.) Most people find that the easier way to live is seductive but not the healthiest way to live. Convenience is not often the long term solution. Bad habits are bad choices.

The 3 principles of wellness and prevention of many diseases are 1. Physical exercise/activity on a regular basis, 2. Eating healthy with reduced portions of more naturally occurring foods, and 3. practicing regular stress management. It requires commitment to put time and energy into using these three pillars of health and many people will try one or two but not find all three in their lives.

Physical exercise or activities for prevention and optimal health should include at least 30 minutes per day for a minimum of 5 days per week. This is minimum for most people to maintain health and vitality. Exercise can be walking, jogging, swimming, cycling, dancing, playing, etc. It does NOT include TV watching or video gaming. Some societies and cultures promote non-automobile driving transportation which may make these people healthier and less sedentary.

Healthy diet and nutritional practices often include eating as close to natural and less “processed foods.” Many people believe the American society eats too much meat, or dairy, or “fast foods,” and this is probably true. Since every person is different, it is difficult to make a blanket judgement and say that “meat eating,” as an example, is bad for everyone. But it is accurate to say that eating too many calories, or too much fast food, or too much food with unpronounceable ingredients is just not a wise choice. Preservatives, artificial coloring, high sugar content, and unnatural flavorings may be worth avoiding, at least in large doses. Fresh fruit and vegetables along with whole grains are generally considered good, unless you have digestive difficulties.

Stress management is very important but often over-looked. Stress kills people. Stress creeps in to people’s lives and robs them of energy, focus, strength, and even time. Stress management often can not eliminate stress from your life, but it can help to minimize the negative effects of stress and anxiety. Our 24/7 information age has create a new set of challenges for our society, and more importantly, our bodies to adapt to reducing the constant attack. A daily relaxation or stress reduction ritual is worthwhile and will save you TIME and energy, in the long run. (Do not believe me…. GO try it for at least 8-12 weeks.)

There are many sources of information regarding healthy choices and prevention techniques that can help to keep us happier and healthier, however, NOT ALL INFORMATION YOU FIND ON THE INTERNET IS RIGHT FOR YOU! You have to make informed choices and you may need GOOD advice and support. Hopefully, you have a GOOD physician or a GOOD nutritionist or a GOOD pharmacist or a GOOD health coach you can discuss information with. Not all health practionners are “GOOD” or have your best well-being in mind. Be careful and get more than one opinion if you are not sure.

Get motivated and get to work. If you need support, find a qualified health coach or trainer to get you started. TAKE responsibility and do not make excuses.

The Stress Education Center has information on many aspects of health and wellness, especially stress reduction. Visit the website at www.dstress.com to learn more about how you get started on your own or get coaching to build a program that is tailored to your specifc requirements.

The Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living

Posted on by

This extreme concept has reason for examination, even today…

“I’m sure you’ve read this quote before: “The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates said that at his trial for heresy. He was on trial for encouraging his students to challenge the accepted beliefs of the time and think for themselves. The sentence was death but Socrates had the option of suggesting an alternative punishment. He could have chosen life in prison or exile, and would likely have avoided death. But Socrates believed that these alternatives would rob him of the only thing that made life useful: Examining the world around him and discussing how to make the world a better place. Without his “examined life” there was no point in living. So he suggested that Athens reward him for his service to society. The result, of course, is that they had no alternative and were forced to vote for a punishment of death.”
Quote from an article by Karl W. Palachuk

But what does this say about YOUR life?… Do you plod through your existence with your eyes focused only on your work or present task, or do you focus on a larger perspective of examining your place in a large frame of reference? Do you question what you hear on the TV or on the internet or in the newspapers or even from your teachers or ministers? Do you spend time and energy adjusting your life’s direction to create better opportunities to serve? Do you challenge yourself to learn new things, no matter what your age or circumstance? Do you risk the fear and anxiety of discovering the deeper secrets of your own existence? Would you confront a found flaw or weakness within yourself to help to make a better YOU? Do you ask for feedback from counselors who do not let you take the easy path through life? Finally, do you place yourself in new experiences to test yourself so that you can “stretch” and to grow emotionally and intellectually?

Many people just give up. They think that they already know everything that they need to know about themselves and their world. They are lazy. They are too scared to risk change. They may be too frightened to challenge themselves and their beliefs with new perspectives. They risk being bad role models for the next generation by not living on the edge and continuing to self-examine and to grow. It is safer and easier to live with old ways of thinking and long held values, but the world, and consciousness, is changing too fast to tolerate, and reward, this anachronistic way of being/thinking. In fact, if you are not thinking FOR YOURSELF someone else’s thought will guide your life and these may not be a good fit for your lifestyle. It takes courage to find, and develop, your own path. It takes courage to stand out and to speak out for your own personal truth. But it is worth it!

In my opinion, there was a war on education (and thinking) in the United States of America which begin in the early 1980’s. We now suffer from a populace which does not no where to find information and perspective. We trust the “media” and are often too lazy to think for ourselves. Stupidity is not an excuse that our electorate can tolerate without our country becoming a second rate power/country. Believing the “media” without fact checking and really thinking is a recipe for disaster. The self-examination includes the difficult view of ourselves and whether we are too lazy to learn or at least checking the “facts” before forming our decisions.

Keep moving forward or risk dying… Challenge yourself! Never fall into the trap of thinking that you are too old to learn or too old to change.

I would love your thoughts and your feedback. Please contact me through our website at the Stress Education Center at www.dstress.com.

Back to School

Posted on by

Its Almost Time for Fall

Today, I am shopping for school supplies for my “little brother,” Mr. Ethan. Ethan is now 13 years old and is entering 8th grade. He has been my “little brother” for almost 4 years. We have had this school supply ritual for the past 4 years as we prepare for another school year. We both feel the optimism of the fresh start and have hopes for a school year filled with success. There are many memories of school preparation that I recall from my own student years and the years of raising my 2 sons. I remember battling with my father to squeeze 6 or 7 dollars worth of new school supplies out of him. It was the only nightmarish part of returning to school. My sons and Mr. Ethan do not have difficult memories of getting my support for their academic experiences.

In the United States, the school year usually begins at the end of the Summer months and in the beginning of the Fall season. There is a lot of history for me of major life transitions at this time of year. Besides school starts, I remember that my mother passed away on September 10th, the night before 9/11 in 2001. I have experienced relationships begin or end in the Fall. I remember jobs starting in the Fall. I remember moving and travels and my birthdays and many other significant experiences that historically have happened to me in September and October. To be honest, I have mixed feelings regarding the period that transitions from the end of Summer into the Fall seasons. Everyone has these anniversaries than can affect the emotional sensitivities of certain dates or of specific times of the year. Every year my wife asked me about how I am doing with my emotional survival at this time of the year because she has had to weather some tough Fall seasons with me in the 29 years we had together.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Fall. I love the change of weather and the days growing shorter. I love the football season and the World Series. The changing colors of the leaves and the crispness in the early morning air are things that I celebrate. And yet, after living for 60 years+, I have ambivalence about what life may bring in these coming months.

I challenge you to reflect on your own memories and feelings about the changes of these seasons. Perhaps, for you, there are other times on the calendar that inspire you emotionally and historically as Fall challenges me. If nothing else, if you live in the Northern Hemisphere remember to begin to prepare. Gather fire wood. Harvest nuts for the Winter. Make your nest safe for coming cool and wet months. And, as always, gather your family and friends for a chance to enjoy the fading warmth and light as the seasons change.

If you live in the Southern Hemisphere, forget all this maudlin drivel and get ready to celebrate Spring and your warm lazy days of Summer…. There is always a different perspective to embrace.

Take good care of yourself. If you require support or assistance with stress or anxiety consider contacting the Stress Education Center for coaching or group trainings at www.dstress.com and send your emotional blessings to my “Little Brother,” Ethan, as he embarks on his fresh academic start.