Special Relationships vs the Holy Relationship

If you were born a human being, you were born to have relationships. You required the support, hopefully the Love, of parents, supporters, and caregivers because you could not survive on your own when you were first born. We learn the good, and the bad, about human relationships in our early years. We grow up striving for “ideal” (and so impossible) “perfect” relationships. Many people, including myself, believe, or have believed, that we can not be “whole” unless we can be defined within a relationship. Hopefully, a “healthy” relationship. We strive for great, supportive friends. We look for healthy supportive family members. We attempt to build healthy, supportive communities to join and participate within. (We can often face the disappointment in the imperfect relationships we “settle” into.)

Eventually, we may come to know that “Healthy” relationships with a partner, family, and friends may hold disappointment or at least, some level of incompleteness. In the study of the Course of Miracles (a professed dictation from Jesus,) these Earthly relationships may be referred to as “Special Relationships.” Our minds and our Egos get caught up in believing that these are worth striving for and without the “perfect” special relationships, we can not find happiness or even “safety.” “The Course” goes on the state that the only “true” relationship is the “Holy Relationship” with the Divine Spirit. We may eventually unlearn the “need” for human attachments and replace this with the connection with the Divine Spirit.

Some highly conscious people might say that “Enlightenment” is the understanding and celebration of your “Holy Relationship” with the Divine. I do not believe that this means we do not honor and celebrate imperfect human relationships, communities, and support. We require human interaction to learn our lessons. We also must be in these relationships to share our stories and to serve our fellow human contacts. We can not learn or grow without the “dramas” which play out as we interact with our fellow pilgrims. The love, the loss, and all the “intimate” interactions we have with the people who surround us are the challenges we have in this life to test out how far we have come in our spiritual evolution.

Where would we be without “sharing” a laugh or tears? Where would we be without making love and possibly risking getting “our hearts broken?” If we take responsibility for our lives, and our deaths, we need to love, and to face loss. We need to assist family to learn and to grow. We need to support and hug friends. One profound series of learnings for me has come from my long relationship with my wife. We had about 30 years together to raise a family and live through the trials of human family relationships. Her terminal diagnosis and the 8.5 years of experiencing cancer taught me many lessons. It made us closer. Her “transition” created a large hole in my life and this has been one of the most important learning experiences of my life… I would not wish this experience on anyone else but I would not trade this experience or the lessons or the memories for anything. Even through the “pain,” I appreciate the gift of my guidance moving my life through these moments and know the value I can share from these challenges. (My story is NOT unique but my lessons were unique and special for me and my development.)

In the study of Mindfulness, we come to learn certain principles which hold truth regarding human relationships. We might work to find Equanimity and know the Impermanence of Human relationships. In so doing we learn to appreciate, without being sucked into, the dramas experienced in interactions. We might find the truth that nothing in our world, and so relationships, are permanent and “ever lasting.” The only permanent thing in our Universe is the unconditional Love which pulses within us from the connection we have with the Divine Spirit. When you remember or “know” this imbedded wisdom you will know your “enlightenment” and your place in the higher consciousness termed (by me) the Divine Spirit.

You are a Miracle! You are a Unique Blessing! Thank you for being you and traveling this path to higher consciousness!

If you are READY and looking for a supportive community where you can share your story, your wisdom, and grow spiritually in a non-religious environment, consider Masters of the Journey.
You are a Blessing! You are a Master! Your wisdom from your life experience can have great value to other pilgrims on the path toward awakening and enlightenment.

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